The Happy Yogini

RMW, a long time student of Patrizia Norelli-Bachelet/Thea and resident of Skambha wrote the letter below explaining to her friends and family why she had chosen to leave a life she knew to go to the mountains of South India and live on a 30 acre property with a dairy farm, cheese factory, horse breeding and a lot of D-I-Y. As a novice student I am just beginning to understand and integrate the knowledge and at the same time am getting the same question from friends, so I asked R if I could publish her letter on my blog and she agreed.

I encourage you to check out the embedded links as well and if you are interested to learn more, a great introduction to PNB’s work is The Magical Carousel,”a simple yet profound tale of two souls on an evolutionary journey.”

CARPE DIEM!

The Happy Yogini

My Life in the Gnostic Circle

I would like to share with you my experience with the Gnostic Circle and Patrizia Norelli-Bachelet/Thea over the years. My work started with Thea herself in 1990. Of course the Gnostic Circle is timeless so I jumped into the Circle itself at birth, as everyone does, at the 0 Point. By the time I came in contact with Thea’s work I had gone through several 9 year cycles and had reached the 5 Point which is ruled By Jupiter, the planet of the guru.

How My life Began in the Gnostic Circle

By 1993 I came to India to study directly with her and in 1996 I wrote the following letter to my friends and family who were wondering what I was doing in India and why I was still here:

“When I talked on the phone with a friend the other day I found it difficult to give her a satisfactory, nutshell explanation of what it is that Patrizia is and does and what I am doing as her student so I tried to do it in aletter. This in part is from the letter that I wrote and I have given it to others who have inquired about my activities. It will take a bit of background work as well as the current update on the yoga I am involved in.

As you know this is a time of transition on the Earth. All the spiritual teachers from the East and the West, the Native Americans as well as the fundamentalists know this is a time of great change. It is perceived by most as an upheaval on the Earth making volcanoes to erupt, earth quakes to occur, floods to take place and creating general mayhem in the world. What is it really all about?

The ‘New Age’ that we are moving into is the Aquarian Age which began in 1926. It is not that we are to transform this world but rather, as the Mother described it, ‘witness the birth of a whole new world’. At a time of such great magnitude as we are experiencing now there are those who are born on earth to focus that new energy. They are called Evolutionary Avatars. I know there is a lot of hype about avatars, ‘you too can be an avatar if you attend the workshops and join the club’. That is not the kind of avatar I am writing of. These are the incarnations who came to ’see’ the earth through this time, the Supramentalisation of life on earth. This process is not accomplished by ‘getting away from it all’ by getting on space ships and leaving the planet, nor is it through meditating yourself into ‘Nirvana’. It is done through the Integral Yoga and realising the supramental life on earth. It is divinizing the earth through this realisation and anchoring it in the earth. ‘The goal, as the Mother said, ‘is not to lose oneself in the Divine Consciousness. The goal is to let the Divine Consciousness penetrate into Matter and transform it. ‘

This has nothing to do with channeling other beings. In ‘The Gnostic Circle’ Patrizia wrote, ‘The consciousness of the Gnostic being is characterized primarily by the ability to see beyond the appearances, with a vision of unity. But this we know has always been the state of realized souls; yet that makes the difference in today’s realization is that the integral yogi follows the perfection of the unfolding spirit in the events of the world with close precision, recognizing the connecting link in the surface events as well as those deeply hidden. That is, he sees the Divine in her full Cosmic Truth, in the state of waking consciousness, not in trance or semi-conscious states, or in the inebriated spasms of divine ecstasies, from where one can perceive the Beloved in All. The experience is in the ordinary consciousness because this has evolved to a higher level and becomes a permanent state which cognizes always in terms of unity, harmony and hence perfection. No aspect of the Earth’s life and process is excluded and one need not abandon this creation in despair and seek the perfection of another plane. The Gnostic being is capable of perceiving the three modes of action the Divine Mother’s creation, preservation and destruction and walks in rhythm with her power at all times.”

In the early 1900’s, Sri Aurobindo was deeply involved with the freedom fighters who were fighting to free India from British rule and began his yoga with the idea of gaining powers to overcome the Brits. Because he was not conscious of his true identity he found himself in jail for a year seemingly for his activities as the editor of one of the freedom journals. I fact it was to take him out of action and confine him in a way that he would go deeply into himself and he opened to the teachings by Ramakrishna and Vivikananda on the inner planes. When he was acquitted and released from prison he left the freedom fighters and went to Pondicherry which was then ruled by the French and out of the hands of the British. There he began his real fight for freedom, his yoga of creating a perfect vessel to anchor the Supramental Consciousness on earth.

Although he had a few others around him it was not until Mirra Richards came to stay that the Sri Aurobindo Ashram came into being in 1920. She was his counterpart, his equal in all ways. Sri Aurobindo said that when one looked at him they should see her and when one looked at her they should see him as well. She was ‘The Mother‘, a manifestation of the Divine Mother on earth. In 1924 his intense yoga took him to his room where he stayed until he left his body in 1950.

The Mother carried on his work in the physical, the transformation of the cells, fully conscious of the job that had to be done. This work for her culminated in 1970 by bringing down the vision of this age, the design of a temple that would anchor this Supramental Energy for this period of time just as the pyramids did in the age of Leo. All through their yoga there were undivine and anti-divine forces attempting to obstruct the work and now they came out in full force in order to disrupt the structure design before it left the drawing board. Over a period of 18 days and nights her vision came and was made clear, the measurements she say were exact, each one being a symbol of Time and in the end the perfect execution of it was thwarted. She was in her 90’s at that time and was not physically able to do battle but the vision was there on the occult plane, she had ’seen’ it and that was enough.

Patrizia came to the Ashram having gone through a major initiation while she was in Rome. She had been studying with Krishnamurthi, who frequently went to Rome. And she studied astrology and she did in depth horoscopes for people, sometimes taking a week to complete. She had never had a desire to go to India until she was requested to do so by the Mother whom she had not met in the physical as yet.

It was not until the Mother left her body in 1973 that Patrizia, through a series of circumstances learned of the conspiracy to change the blueprints of the perfect vision from the very beginning. She was the only one who could ’see’ and understand how utterly perfect the design was and then able to explain it. When she went to the ones responsible for the construction not only with her own knowledge but the Mother’s own words and directions, she too was ignored. So her yoga for all these years, first at the Ashram and then in Kodaikanal, through her writings has been able to hold that vision, document it, and work with the knowledge it brings. This is a monument that shows the evolution of our time that lives and breaths. It is the way of explaining the whole evolution of mankind as well as the Universe, the Cosmos. It is truly bringing the Divine into Matter.

So Skambha, as I see it, is like the Garden of Eden where the Tree of Knowledge grows and must be tended and nurtured. It is not a place to go with the idea that you can contemplate in peace and harmony, but it is a place to be totally involved in the work of holding the Centre for the entry of the Supramental Consciousness on earth. Early in my stay at Skambha, as I was attempting to understand why I was there besides to make cheese, Patrizia told me that I was there to Serve, Participate and See. It is not only for the Tree to grow but for us to eat the fruit as well and ’see’ as she does. Over my time there I have served, I’ve tried to participate, I have had glimpses but I have so much more work to do for it is a long way to the top of the mountain.

The following is an excerpt from conversations of the Mother concerning those who wanted to go to the Sri Aurobindo Asharam which is very apropos for anyone wanting to go to Skambha.

Come for the Divine Work

Every time someone comes to tell me, ‘I come for my yoga, I say, ‘Oh, no! then don’t come. It is much more difficult here than anywhere else. ‘ …

If someone comes to tell me, ‘I come to work, I come to make myself useful’, it is all right. But if someone comes and says, ‘I have many difficulties outside, I can’t manage these difficulties, I want to come here because it will help me, I say, ‘No, no, it will be much more difficult here; your difficulties will increase considerably. And that is what it means, because they are no longer isolated difficulties; they are collective difficulties.

So in addition to your own personal difficulty you have all the frictions, all the contacts, all the reactions, all the things which come from the outside. As a test. Exactly on the weak point, the thing that’s most difficult to solve; it is there that you will hear from someone the phrase which was just the one you did not want to here; someone will make towards you that gesture which could shock you; you find yourself facing a circumstance, a movement, a fact, an object, anything at all - just the things which

… ‘Ah, how I should liked this not to happen’. And that is what will happen and more and more. Because you do not do your yoga for yourself alone. You do the yoga for everybody - without wanting to – automatically.

So when people come and tell me, ‘I come here for peace, quietness, leisure, to do my yoga’, I say, ‘No, no, no! Go away immediately somewhere else, you will be much more peaceful any where else than here.’

If someone else comes and says, ‘Well here I am, I felt I should consecrate myself to the divine Work, I am ready to do any work at all that you give me’, then I say, ‘Good, that’s all right. You have good will, endurance, and some capacity, it is all right. But to find the solitude necessary for your inner development it is better to somewhere else, anywhere else, but not here ‘.

I hope this has helped you understand in part where I am and what I am doing there with cheese making as a portion of the yoga involved. Of course there is much, much more that Patrizia has put into her many books. The object is to live the yoga for as Sri Aurobindo said ‘All life is yoga’”

Living the Gnostic Circle

Today I’m not sure I can say it any better for I am still amazed at the process of the Gnostic Circle. With the Circle and the living guru to guide me I have lived another full cycle of 9 years becoming more aware of this natural process of growth and consciousness with each year. I have found the Gnostic Circle valid to follow as an individual but also as a way to see all in the light of a dynamic movement and life in everything. Thea has recently written, ‘The Gnostic Circle is a static composite diagram. It is when we add TIME to the equation that the Circle moves and becomes dynamic. This is the key feature. What has been eliminated from the quest for the past two thousand years is DYNAMISM. This is what the Gnostic Circle can contribute by the allegiance of Time. Therefore it can now be stated that Time is an ally and not simply the destroyer of all material substance. With it we can BUILD since there can be no material structure without the mortar of TIME and with the Gnostic Circle we BUILD a cosmos, a harmonious whole. ‘

As I have lived the Gnostic Circle each year I have tried to follow it more consciously watching how the cycles manifest in my life as activities and opportunities to learn and grow not only in my own personal microcosm but as it is played out in the world affairs. Like a tapestry the threads are interwoven some more slowly than others. Looking at the Circle you will see that it is a circle within a circle, within another circle, within another circle. Each is one moving at a different pace. The annual cycle is completed in twelve months, next is completed in 9 years having traversed the full circle 9 times, then the one moving more slowly taking 90 years.

The threads of the tapestry stem from the 12 sections of the zodiac and the 9 points or 10 planets. Each one interjects its own special quality providing us with a subtle focus of energy for a period of time, crossing, merging with that of the other layers as it goes creating the fabric which we call our lives. As time moves on events happen to shape us providing opportunities to learn and to grow. To find your present place in the Gnostic Circle is quite easy by calculating from your birth date the positions in various layers of the Circle. All layers start at 0 then move forward at their specific rates of 1 year, 9 years and life. By watching the passage of time at the rate of 12 signs of the zodiac in one year divided by the four quarters it gives you the way of knowing whether you are focusing on your physical, emotional, mental or spiritual bodies for that period. Moving simultaneously at the rate of 9 segments per cycle, each point/number is upheld by a planet and infusing its own specific energy.

If you look at the concentric circles of the Gnostic Circle as separate they appear to be wheels like the gears in a clock, each one is rotating at a regulated speed, interconnecting with the other wheels driven by the central shaft. This way you can see the dynamics of the Circle at work or you could say the Gnostic Circle at play for our lives played out; the journey of life regulated by the clock work of Time. Now if that were all that we had to regulate our lives everyone would have the same experience so the question is; What makes the difference in each individual life?

Knowing that each individual comes in at the 0 point of the Gnostic Circle everyone is equal but then when you can imagine placing that point at the place of your birth in your Zodiacal Natal Horoscope you will see that this is where the magnificent difference comes into play. The wheels begin to turn the blue print takes on shape starting with the parents you were born to, your place in the family, societal status, environment, country, plus all the elements involving the earth at that time, unlimited factors surrounding your birth. This is when the play, the music, the dance really begins. Starting out slowly at birth you lay down the basic web, weaving in the threads as growth goes on. You can see how it fans out around the center, the central shaft driving the whole, which is the seed of you. As the tapestry grows some threads interplay for a time, others just a short thread interjecting a knot of colour as people and events come and go through the picture of your life.

Once the picture is seen it is possible to do a yoga of examining your life by looking at it as a whole, then as separate parts and following the threads in need of rectification. Some times you will have to cut some of the threads off, sometimes repair the ones that have been frayed or left dangling, sometimes by untying the knots. When you become aware of the place you stand at this point in the circle you can see the best route you are able to use to root out the negativity active in your life and go more quickly towards the light. Again as Thea has written; ‘Therefore it can now be stated that Time is an ally and not simply the destroyer of all material substance. With it we can BUILD since there can be no material structure without the mortar of TIME and with the Gnostic Circle we BUILD a cosmos, a harmonious whole.‘ We can use Time on our journey as we ascend to our goal of Knowledge and Truth.

RMW

Skambha,  1996-2005

I recently experienced two re-entries within a months time which felt as though I was traveling through the atmosphere without the benefit of a protective spaceship.

In early November, to save time and travel costs, I thought I’d take a brief trip to Singapore (SG) to get another India Visa. I was so certain that this was the right course of action, in part because I didn’t feel ready to relate to my former life and loved ones.

Apparently the Divine had other plans. Within 24 hours of my arrival in SG I unexpectedly discovered I had to go home. I was shocked and dismayed. Thankfully, I had a 20 hour flight home to help me transition. (I watched a lot of movies!) A couple of friends had offered to fetch me from JFK and I connected them via email to figure out which one would as I had to log off and board my flight, so I didn’t know whose face I would see there but I knew that I was taken care of. My first response at seeing I’s smiling self was gratitude and joy followed immediately by relief and a release of tears. HOME!

As I mentioned, I was so certain that my plan was also God’s plan that when it didn’t happen, I thought it might be a sign that I was not supposed to return to India. I arrived in CT on 9 Nov and found myself in a very painful void between both worlds. I maintained a low profile for the first few days to allow my body clock and my emotions to adjust to U.S. time and space.

For 9 days I prayed, and proceeded with getting rid of more stuff along with my storage unit with the help, once again, of the amazing Betsy Krobot of Betsy K Home Choreography. While I didn’t know where I would end up, I did know that I needed to keep taking steps forward. Acting ‘as if’ as they say.

Not only did I not know where I was supposed to be, I also didn’t know where I wanted to be. As the days passed I began having thoughts that I didn’t want to go back to India. I couldn’t imagine life here or there. What a conundrum!

My prayer was very simple: HELP! Hahaha…I am only partly joking. I asked to be shown what I was meant to be doing…and where. I prayed for a message so clear that even I couldn’t mistake it!

And then, on November 17th, as I was riding the train into NYC for my appointment with the Indian Visa outsourcing company I felt a shift. I very clearly knew that I wanted to go back to India. It’s no surprise that the process of getting my Visa felt blessed and 5 days later I received notification that my 1 year multi-entry Visa was approved! Yay! A big shout out to the very helpful Travisa Outsourcing gal with whom I had email and phone contact, and who called in favors to expedite the processing of my application.

Then the trepidation set in. I now had a 1 year Visa with a commitment to my teacher (and enough money at the then current exchange rate) to stay for 6 months. What was this next period going to be like? I knew some of the challenges and had already been asked to take on an important role at Skambha. Would I be able to handle it? What kinds of spiritual shifts/ insights/ transformations lay ahead? Only Gods knows.

My 2nd re-entry, back to India, was also buffered by two days in Mysore with my teacher who was paying a visit to the racetrack where she keeps a couple of horses. I slept off my jetlag and had darshans with PNB. [Darshan n. An audience with a spiritual leader, either private or in a group] I won’t go into details here but suffice to say that she told me it was time for me to let go of a key part of my identity that had been with me for decades. As unexpected as it was to hear, we both knew that I was ready. In addition, when I returned to Skambha I was received as staff and no longer a visitor. My responsibilities are bigger and I have been handling the challenges in a much more mature and able manner than I have with similar work experiences in the past. I am growing up mentally and emotionally, which is very grounding. The ladies here have noticed it, too.

Apparently I didn’t need that spaceship afterall…

Carpe Diem!

The Happy Yogini

In January of 2009, after ignoring numerous requests over the previous 6 months, I finally relented and joined the Cult of Facebook. I am so glad I did because I’ve gotten back in touch with some very dear friends from various parts of my life with whom I’d lost touch over the years.

Invariably there have been quite a few folks who I’ve “friended” but didn’t really know well in person and on two occasions have slashed and burned through my list de-friending people who didn’t meet the litmus test; Do I really consider them friends, or have any type of relationship with them outside of Facebook? For the most part, those people haven’t noticed that I disappeared from their list which confirmed there wasn’t a connection. Recently I’ve relaxed a little on this and have friended people with whom I have a lot of mutual friends – mainly from college.

In early September I was looking at the list of “people you may know” and saw M whom I knew in college but wasn’t really close to. Something had me friend him and in less than 24 hrs he accepted. When I logged on to FB a few days later I discovered a message – “Crazy Patti – K says Hello!” - with friend request from J (wife of K, a pal from the late 80’s in Rochester) who I haven’t seen in over 20 years.

I was SO happily surprised and immediately accepted her friend request.

J gave me the highlights of her life followed by “What about you? A quick rundown of your life since we last saw you around our wedding in 1990!!”

“Here goes…I went to airplane mechanic school in ‘90/’91, went to California ’91-‘96, moved to NYC and got a corporate job, got sober in Sept 1997 (yay!), moved to Stamford CT with that company and worked there ‘til the market crash in 2008 (they ’set me free’ thank goodness!), during my time at that co. I bought the cutest brownstone in Fairfield, CT where I lived for 6 years. 2009-2010 went to yoga teacher training, sold the house and most of my stuff, taught yoga for 18 months and in June came to India to live at a spiritual center with my teacher and a small group of students. And then you found me! Hahahaa…it’s been a grand experience (life, that is) and I have such fond memories of you and K and our posse….How did you find me?”

“I’m facebook friends with M and noticed your name. I knew it was you immediately!”

Check this out: M and K have a mutual friend, B. K and B grew up together in Rochester and M and B met at SUNY Oswego. Neither K nor B are on FB. M and J, K’s wife, subsequently met and became FB friends (acquaintances in real life) and when M accepted my friend request J saw it and told K. It sounds convoluted, but it shows me once again how small the world is, particularly with the advent of FB.

I am very happy to say that J and I are going to surprise K with my visit to see them on my way to Rochester for Thanksgiving. It feels so good to discover the same deep fondness is present after so many years of lost contact, and that J and I have things in common that we discovered separately during the intervening years.

It’s going to be a wonderful Thanksgiving and I wish the same for you.

CARPE DIEM!

The Happy Yogini

I’m baaack! In the U.S., that is. Yeah, it’s a surprise to me, too.

I wrote awhile back that it took me a couple of months to “land” in India and not too long thereafter I knew that I “needed another 6 months” there. I experienced an internal shift which included slowing down and coming into the present moment and I knew there was more to discover. I talked to my teacher, who was happy to have me stay, and I figured out that I could swing it financially. Yay!

To save time and money I decided to go to Singapore to get my Visa and to combine it with some market research for the cheese manufacturing business where I volunteer.

The mishaps began when I accidentally left my India cell phone in the vehicle that brought me to the airport and minutes later I was unexpectedly charged a few hundred dollars for overweight baggage. I mistakenly assumed that the weight limit was the same to Singapore as it was from the U.S. A child cried and fussed throughout the entire 4.5 hour middle of the night flight. I arrived exhausted at Singapore airport and discovered that the telephone number for the gal I’d be staying with was one digit too long so I could not reach her. I also came to realize that I didn’t have her exact address, only the building name. In spite of these experiences I had a strong sensation that God was present, I was being taken care of and there was no problem.

This was evidenced by the fact that for every “wrinkle” in my plan there were 2 to 3 people I would encounter that were willing to assist me.  I said a little prayer as I was walking to the airport Taxi area that I get a driver who was willing to provide extra help if needed. As soon as I laid eyes on Asmi I breathed a sigh of relief. He had a gentle appearance and kind eyes and I called on him 4 out of 5 times during my stay in Singapore. I needed a place to leave my bags for a couple of hours and Jane, the “holiday secretary” at the Blessed Sacrament Church, located in the neighborhood of my host, was happy to let me leave my stuff in the office. Shane, the phone store gal, set me up with an inexpensive phone, sim card and pre-paid minutes and she let me use her laptop and internet connection to connect with Nicole, my host.

I also had a wink from God experience on my walk from the church to the phone store. Next door to the church is the beautiful Sri Muneeswaran Hindu Temple and I popped in to check it out. Inside there was a large courtyard
surrounded by altars to various Hindu gods and on the far side a table was set up behind which stood two Hindu priests giving offerings to visitors to place in front of the various altars. Something drew me toward these two young men and I remember thinking that I didn’t know why I was approaching them. As I neared I recognized one of the men as having participated in a ceremony I attended 3 years before, in India at the center where I’ve spent the past 5 months. I asked him if he remembered that experience, if he was there, and sure enough he was! What are the odds? He’s been in Singapore for 2 years and will be there for another 3 months. I surely felt as though God was showing me that all was well.

I had an unfortunate experience with my host and after feeling very uncomfortable staying at her place that night, decided the following morning to cut short my stay there and find other accommodations for the remainder of my time in Singapore.

Asmi fetched me and off we went to the Indian Embassy.  My efforts to get a Visa were thwarted when the interviewer told me in no uncertain terms that they do not provide Visas to non-residents, Thank You Very Much Have a Nice Day Good Bye Madam. I was dumbfounded because I had done the research and would not have made the journey if this information was clearly stated on the website.

What next? “Asmi, to the airport please!” I spent the rest of the day researching plane fares and emailing my pals in CT to let them know I was coming home and that I’d need a lift from the airport and a place to stay. The people at the Singapore Airlines customer service desk, The Coffee Bean and Starbucks, not to mention my pals at home, all gave me assistance in one form or another.

The most difficult part of the unfolding was my disbelief that I had to go home and my feeling that I wasn’t ready. I am in the midst of this spiritual experience and I believed that I should remain in the cocoon, as it were, of India/Asia. I couldn’t possibly explain to my friends and family what I’ve experienced and I felt completely ill-equipped to be in the energy of the Northeast U.S. with it’s fast paced rat race. But the Divine Plan seemed to be showing me differently. Several dear friends got back to me within minutes that I had a ride from the airport and a place to stay and I found a reasonable airfare for a flight leaving the following day.

On Wednesday morning, after a brief meeting with a gourmet food distributor, Asmi delivered me to the airport one last time and off I went, by way of Taiwan. I left Singapore at 1:30 pm and after 20 hours of total flight time, arrived at 9:30 pm on the same day! How is that even possible? Gratefully, I noticed during the first leg of my flight the feeling that I really goofed up drained completely out of my body. I don’t know why I had to make the trip to Singapore but it must be part of the Divine Unfolding or it wouldn’t have happened; I am not so powerful as to be able to mess up God’s Plan.

While still in Singapore I observed to my mother that if your life turns upside down and you can choose where it will happen, I suggest Singapore. I have never experienced another place with absolutely no chaos and people so willing to help at every turn. The other interesting observation is that I didn’t get a sense of cultural history or uniqueness – I took only one photo. There are some very cool buildings but I could do a simple internet search to see them again.

The photo I took which I thought summed up my impression of Singapore, and which I doubted I’d see online, was the Singapore Airport women’s restroom. I’d put it on par with any 5 star hotel, minus the attendant. Immaculate, stylish and calming…with greenery even.

So, what’s next for me? MY plan is to get a Visa this week, empty my storage unit next week and then head home to Rochester for a family Thanksgiving followed immediately by a return flight to India….

…I wonder if that in any way matches God’s Plan for me….

CARPE DIEM!

The Happy Yogini

“I’m learning Tamil”

It happened spontaneously one day as I was taking photos of these beautiful people and noticed that their smiles would disappear the moment I aimed my camera in their direction, even when they asked to be photographed. I asked one of the folks who speaks English how to say in Tamil, the local language, “Smile!/ Siddipu!”. At first I mis-pronounced it as “Siddipoh” which I discovered meant “Smile Go Away!” Now sometimes I’ll deliberately say the latter to get the spontaneous smile and laughter that makes for a great photo (ex. ladies pictured).

From there, I asked our “office man”, M, how to say “How are you?/ Ningul Saukiyama?” was his reply. And off I went, greeting every one of our local employees. They were caught off guard initially but immediately each one began to help me correctly pronounce words and teach me new ones.

One of the other things I learned to say early on was “Please speak slowly!/ Deyeavusedu Medooah Pesingay” which also means “Please Speak Quietly”, though given the context of my learning, they distinguish. Once I accurately sort out the sylables, I have been easily able to correctly pronounce the words of this beautiful language of 4 – 5000 years, one of the oldest in India (ancient wall carvings pictured).

Thus far I have learned:

Courtesies: Deyeavusedu/Please, Nanri/Thank you, EyeYa/Sir, Ama/Ma’am

Greetings: Callie Vanacum/Good Morning, Madeeam Vanacum/Good Afternoon, Nallie Vanacum/ Good Evening, Irah Vhu Vanacum/Good Night, Ningul Nalam Irikingila/How are you?, Nan Nalam/I am fine, Nalakey Poppom/See you tomorrow,

The days of the week: Thingul Keelamay/Monday, Sayvuwhy Keelamay/Tuesday, Bhuden Keelamay/Wednesday, Vialen Keelahmay/Thursday, Vellee Keelamay/Friday, Sunny Keelamay/Saturday, Kneeayruh Keelamay/Sunday

A bit about meals and eating: Nan Caley unavhu sapideh pohiden/ I am eating breakfast, Nan madiyanem sapideh pohiden/ I am eating lunch, Nan makosalem sapidehkundueirukkieren/I am eating corn.

And let’s not forget the all important “Milking finished/Paul Moodindadeh” and “Please close the door!/Deyeavusedu Kadavhu Muduga!”

My next goal is to learn how to tell time. I’ve already learned how to say “6:30/Ar Array”, because our most recent calf was born this past Monday at that time of night and it struck me as a good name for her. Whatever it takes to learn, right?

The writing is an entirely different kettle of fish, comprised of 240 loopy, squiggly characters, which I am not inclined to tackle as yet. The Tamil words and phrases I’ve written are purely my phonetic spellings and are tweaked often as I improve my understanding and pronunciation.

Speaking Tamil, more than any other action, has connected me with our Indian population. On a very basic level I am meeting them on their turf and it feels really good to pierce the language barrier, even if I flub it up at times.

Apuram Poppom! See you later!

CARPE DIEM!

The Happy Yogini

Skambha is an incredible 30 acre property on the side of a mountain which has a dairy with 40 or so cows, a cheese factory, and 15 or so horses. We employ just under 50 people to maintain it all and as I began to help with ‘wages’, I discovered that there are quite a few family ties.

In fact, in one family alone we employ 11 people; Rani (horses) , I Rajendren (supervisor), Sin Raj [Second Photo Center] (horses) and Amara (cheese factory) are siblings. Their dad, V Raju (cow shed) also works here, as does I Rajendran’s wife, Lakshmi [Photo Below Far Left] (cowshed), Sin Raj’s wife, Nirmala [Photo Below Second from Right] (cow shed), Amara’s husband, Rama Krishnan (workshop), their daughter and son, Dharani (dairy kitchen) and Ranjit (weekend helper at the Market) and Tamil Selvam [Lower left photo, far right] (horses), Rama Krishnan’s cousin.

Before Skambha came into existence in 1987, there was no consistent employment in the surrounding towns. I understand that folks would do seasonal work for 3 months and then barely survive on 1 meal a day for the remainder of the year. Tough living to say the least. Not only do we provide regular employment, we also purchase cow’s milk from the neighboring families who may own one or two cows to supplement their income. Additionally, we purchase fruits and veggies from our ladies who work in the two kitchens. Fresh fruit and greens every day….everybody wins!

Of course, the down side of employing family members is that when someone dies, gets married, gets their first period, or has a baby naming ceremony we can easily lose 1/3 of the staff for at least a day!

From a corporate perspective, which I have, there is a high degree of risk with this kind of scenario. But while I may come in, look around and ‘see opportunities for streamlining and improvement’, the folks (other student/volunteers) who’ve lived here for +10 years see children growing up and getting a better education than their parents, young people getting married and having children , etc., with the knowledge that employment at Skambha is responsible for so many families having better lives and brighter futures.

Other family ties:

Doumany (horses) * Murali (office staff) – Mother/son

Padma (horses) * Balamurugan [Left Photo Far left] (horses) – Mother/son

Saleth Mary [Below left] (Dairy Kitchen) * Veelankani (laundry/cleaning) * Beni [Below right] and Felix (school boys who helps on weekends) – Sisters and their respective sons

Saravanan (cow milking) * Kalimuthu (occasional driver) * Madurai (grass cutting) – Brothers

Kalimuthu * Veni [Top Photo Far Right] (cowshed)  - Husband/wife

Arunuchalam (grass cutting) * Muthu Lakshmi [Top Photo Second from Left] (cowshed) - Husband/Wife

Subbiah (cowshed) * Leelavathi (cowshed) – Husband/wife

Ganapathy [Bottom Photo right] (grass cutting) * Seeta [Bottom Photo Left] (grass cutting) – Husband/wife* Umadevi [Bottom Photo Midde] (grass cutting) – Daughter-in-Law

May Skambha and people from the local communities continue to support one another!

Carpe Diem!

The Happy Yogini

I have a multifaceted relationship with fear.

Sometimes I am unconscious to it and I base my decisions on avoiding whatever is scaring me. If I am lucky, I’ll become aware of it and course correct.

I’ve also made decisions to take actions in order to overcome my fears. Intense visceral experiences like jumping out of a perfectly good airplane and attending trapeze school to conquer my fear of heights. Incidentally, I realized that skydiving didn’t put a dent in that fear, as I was “too high up”, it wasn’t real for me. I discovered that after I landed.

Trapeze school was a different matter altogether.

When my pals and I, The Spectacles we called ourselves, decided that it would be the perfect adventure after having met each other on a dogsledding trip in Alaska I hadn’t even considered the height component. Upon arrival at the Trapeze school on NYC’s West Side Highway, we paid the fee, signed the liability waivers and then prepared by flipping around on a trapeze bar that was 6’ off the ground before moving on to the real thing, which entailed climbing a 20’ ladder to reach the platform. Half way up I remembered that heights terrified me and I froze for a few moments. I continued on v e r y slowly, my body as stiff as a board, and when I got to the platform I gripped the metal bars that served as supports and stood stock still.

Every fiber of my being was tensed up and I felt like I couldn’t move. The teacher was so calm and assured me as he took hold of the trapeze belt around my waist, that I “wasn’t going anywhere until it was time”.  I trusted him but I was still petrified.

And then something shifted inside.

As I stood at the edge of the platform, with my toes hanging over the edge as instructed, I realized that I would not be able to have the experience that I wished to have if I didn’t let go of the fear and allow my body to relax. The experience that followed was extraordinary. It felt as though a cork in the bottom of each foot was removed and all of the fear drained out of my body as if it were orange juice being poured from a glass (OJ? I dunno why, but that’s what I saw in my mind’s eye…)

And a moment later I hopped off the platform.

As directed, I swung my legs out, then back, then I flipped upside down and hooked my legs over the bar and let go of my hands and looked where I was told to look (behind me), then do the exact opposite, lift my legs out in front of me and let goooooooo! Landing with several big bounces on this HUGE net. OMG, that was FUN!!!! I could not stop laughing, the adrenaline was coursing through me! So I did it again, and because I followed the ques as and when they were given both times, I graduated to BEING CAUGHT!!!

I scrambled up the ladder (yup, scrambled I did), followed the instructions again on que, and at the moment when I was upside down, arms outstretched looking behind me …there was one of the trapeze guys there to catch me. We locked hands around forearms and as his trapeze pulled away from mine, my legs unhooked and I was flying through the air with the greatest of ease! WOW.

“Wonder”, one of the Spectacles, video’d the catch and much to my surprise the whole thing lasted all of 15 seconds. To me it seemed like eternity.

Does this mean that fear is a choice? I hadn’t thought so until that moment on the platform when I chose to let it go.

Fear is a powerful emotion and I wish to have as conscious a relationship with it as possible.

One of my favorite feelings is when I let the fear push me forward like body surfing an ocean wave. So exhilarating! Fear seems inevitable to me, built-in to a life lived outside of a comfort zone. Taking risks, pushing boundaries, marching to the beat of a different drummer…all of those things generate fear.

BUT, when I forge ahead following my truth I discover that the “Worse Case Scenario” playing in my head NEVER HAPPENS.

The result? A sense of freedom that those golden handcuffs could never buy.

It reminds me of a quote I heard a number of years ago that I posted on a bulletin board in my home and looked at every day for a year:

Fear knocked on the door

Faith answered

No one was there (unknown)

CARPE DIEM!

The Happy Yogini

Yippee!!!! Yahooo!!!! I’ve got a fancy new (to me) CAMERA!!!!  YAY!!!!

I’m a shutterbug and have had a “good camera”, aka Canon Eos SLR for years. I received my first one (a film version) for my birthday in 1993 and stuck with Canon when I made the transition to digital a number of years ago.

Sadly, my last camera was swiped from my home last July. I was in the process of getting renters insurance when it happened and I was pretty upset given that it was one of the few treasured possessions I hung onto during the Big Purge.

After the initial shock wore off, I decided that I would create a Zen Opportunity out of the situation.  What would it be like to live without a camera? Was it something that I could let go of? I was curious about how it would feel to be in my life rather than behind a lens observing it.

Surprisingly, it was kind of OK. To be clear, I had one of Fairfield County’s finest, Detective F, on the case and would have been very happy to have my stuff back (camera, memory cards, a pearl ring, a second, very old pocket digital camera), but short of that I was getting on fairly well.

‘Round about October my dear pal, K, told me that her stepson had a camera that he no longer used and much to my surprise and delight, he gave me a mini digital camera. I bought a battery, memory card and charger and I was BACK IN BUSINESS! It took great photos and fit in my back pocket – perfect.

Fast forward 8 months and I find myself in India, of all places. Sure I’m taking a ton of photos, but I can’t capture the monkeys like I know is possible with a Digital SLR (d slr) and telephoto lens nor can I focus in on tiny flowers and insects.

So, during a recent meditation I got quiet and sat with this consideration of needing/wanting/desiring a d slr camera.

Eureka!

This is not an unconscious “Gotta Have It!” to satisfy my ego or to fill the “God Shaped Hole”. Photography is one of the ways I express my creativity. It has been for years. It makes sense for me to have a “good camera”. I’ve gotten rid of so many things and am living happily with less, and a camera is a thing that has a purpose in my life.

So the next day I called my pal, F, in Kodai and asked him if he had any friends with camera equipment to sell. “My pal, A, is a photographer I’ll give him a call and get back to you.”

This pal ‘coincidentally’ had a Canon d slr with 70 – 300mm telephoto lens (to photog monkeys) and a standard 18 -55mm lens with an attachable macro lens (for tiny flowers and insects), two batteries, a 1 gig memory card and 2 extra lens filters. This equipment was in storage and not for sale and F told me that A was willing to sell it to me only because I am a fellow photographer and a friend of his. The cost? Rs. 17,000 (Rupees) = USD$380. A fair price, for sure.

I have wished for many things in my life that I didn’t really believe in (or want…) and not surprisingly I didn’t get them. Manifesting this equipment was simple and very fast because having it was true down to my core. This has come as a revelation to me as I’ve never really considered my wanting of things at any deep level before and I am very excited to make it a habit.

Hey, MONKEY, say Jackfruit! (CLICK!)

CARPE DIEM!

The Happy Yogini

A BABY CAME TODAY!!!! YIPPEE!! YAY!!! WAAAHOOO!!!!

In India for less than a month, on Monday, July 4th as I came down to the Dairy Kitchen for breakfast I stumbled onto a cow giving birth! (The cow maternity area is conveniently located adjacent to the Dairy Kitchen….?) There was a flurry of activity with folks assisting the cow by pulling on the calfs legs, moving the calf to the mother so she could clean him, etc..

I witnessed in total amazement as the little guy stood up within 20 minutes of being born! As luck would have it, my camera battery was dead so I didn’t get photos until ‘Crackerjack’ was 1 day old.

This little guy was literally jumping up and down from the get go, and with his birth coinciding  with the birthday of our great country, I was inspired to name him Crackerjack (‘Firecracker’ didn’t roll off the tongue in quite the same way…).  The babies usually aren’t named because most are sold, but his name stuck. AND his mom is giving a record amount of milk; 27 litres/DAY at her peak! Evidently 21 l/d is the usual peak amount.

The next pregnant cow, Himamala, is now ready to give birth – we’ve been on alert for several days and this afternoon the cowshed staff sent word that ‘It’s Time!’ – and this time I’m armed with 2 charged batteries, a wide angle lens and plenty of space on my memory card.

Yeah, I get that most folks (perhaps my readers, even?) might not want to see graphic pictures of a cow giving birth but one of the most wonderful things about my stay here is that these kinds of experiences are so far from my previous (normal?) life. Case in point, after the birth the momma cow is milked and the first pail gets poured into the river as an offering. Now that’s cool!

Fast forward several hours. Momma and baby are sleeping and I am reflecting on the event.

Friends, when the head appeared the little rascal was sticking his tongue out! Hahaha!!! And in the subsequent hours after his arrival, I noticed that his little baby cow tongue still sticks out of his mouth ever so slightly… it is so cute!

The name that keeps popping to mind for this little bull is Slick. Stay with me here….That’s how he came out before his momma cleaned him off and the word lick is hidden in there which is the action of a tongue when outside of the mouth…get it? I don’t think the folks here are going to appreciate my logic or creativity but I LOVE IT!

Before coming to India I don’t recall ever witnessing any type of birth (as if one could forget that experience) and I believe that it is the most powerful miracle on our planet, regardless of the species.

Welcome, Little Baby Slick!

CARPE DIEM!
The Happy Yogini